Embarrassing Things I've Done As a Doula

  • Transcript

    Welcome to doula tips and tits. This podcast is a place where we answer one question about doula work, both to support you and to help you support your clients. I'm Kaely Harrod. I've been supporting families in this perinatal space since my oldest was born, 12, nearly 13 years ago.

    I am a birth and postpartum doula childbirth educator, La Leche League leader, and a doula coach. I love guiding and supporting doulas as they work out their doula business. It is a tremendous joy to be trusted in this way.

    Thank you for joining us on this journey. Welcome back to doula tips and tips. Today I want to have a lighter episode. I want to talk to you about embarrassing things that have happened to me as doula.

    So you're welcome that you're benefiting from some of the ridiculousness that I have done or seen at births. Now I'm not going to share client information, of course, but I am going to share back from my earliest births some things that I consider embarrassing moments for myself, either when I was interacting with providers or with my clients or in any other scenario.

    So the first one that comes to mind is one of the very first births I attended. I don't know, I don't remember exactly what number they were, maybe three, maybe number three or four. And I was their backup doula.

    So their doula had been with them for a long time. I came as their backup and the client had chosen an epidural at that point. And so we're like talking and you know, I'm rubbing her feet and things like that.

    We're discussing when partners used to like go down to the pub and wait till the baby was born and then be like, I have a son, you know, like that ridiculousness. And I'm looking at her chart. So I'm looking at like the contraction monitor and the heart rate of the baby, et cetera, and rubbing her feet.

    And then she said, well, you have been amazing. And I said, oh, thank you so much. And then glanced at her and realized she is not in fact talking to me. She is talking to her partner because we were talking about these partners that were ridiculous.

    And she's talking to him and they both kind of like awkwardly smiled at me and I was like, okay, all right, great. Wonderful. Awesome. You're not talking to me, but I did not say anything about it. I was just like, okay.

    So that's the first one. Another one that I remember very clearly is my, my one of my first births with this midwife that I adore. And the midwife was talking to my client. My client had had a really long pushing stage and had had a posterior baby.

    So that's a baby that's back to back with you, right? And the midwife said to my client, sometimes this happens when a baby is OP. And my client said, what's OP? And I said, over time, because she was like a week past her due date, the midwife looked at me and then was like a posterior baby.

    And I was like, okay. I was like, I don't know what I'm talking about. Who am I? And I have this memory because I then learned, I then went to a spinning babies training and learned all about posterior babies.

    And it was a whole thing. And I've worked with that midwife a bunch of times since and like adore them. And it just is like this memory that I have stuck in my head that was embarrassing. Another memory that I have is I was called in as a backup, so again this is a client that I am just meeting that day and I was there for a very long time.

    Now this client was having a home birth so we were at their house and they were a family that shared a bed. They were co -sleeping family so they had like a, I think their kiddo was like three or four, and so they had a king -sized bed and then this like toddler bed kind of like up against it.

    So at one point we were trying to get her to rest and so to get her to rest, oh excuse me, we were all laying down in her bed and what ended up happening is that we basically just all fell asleep in between every contraction.

    So it was her partner and her and then me and we would all sleep and then she would start contracting, she would get up on her knees, her partner and I would push on her hips, and we'd all lay back down and go back to sleep.

    And to this day I'm like we really just all like climbed a bed together like this. I mean I've been with them for a while and I was exhausted just like they were, you know, so but that wasn't necessarily what I was expecting, like that wasn't what I was planning.

    Also the client was like come in bed like you can rest too. I mean she did not care at all but that's not, that was not my intention when I climbed in bed to help with contractions was not to like then sleep with them in their co -sleeping bed and to just wake up to help with contractions and go back to sleep.

    I will say it's the best sleep I've gotten at a birth ever probably and it was lovely and wonderful and also now I'm like I really did that. The last thing I'm going to share is something that I have learned from other doulas that is very common.

    Apparently the mixture of irregular sleeping and eating and adrenaline rushes causes pretty significant gassiness. So there are many times when I have had some pretty terrible farts that I needed to have in the midst of a birth that I have like gone to get water or gone to get juice or gone to whatever so I can walk out of the room because I know I'm going to fart so stinky and I do not know what that is like why that is the worst side effect of all of those hormonal things to have bad gas.

    How horrible but it's also kind of humorous because of course in the midst of birth the person giving birth has gas in most cases and there's lots of scents and smells and whatnot so it is kind of like camouflaged by that but still not my favorite thing in the midst of a birth and you know like holding it in and being crampy is also not a good idea so I'd say that's my last.

    I apologize for yawning so much I've been at a birth and so I'm a little sleepy but those are my embarrassing moments for you and I would love to hear your embarrassing moments. I am over on instagram at Haradula if you have not yet connected with me there please do that I would love to get to know you I would love to hear about your embarrassing moments and I would love for you to join my newsletter so my newsletter comes out every other Friday what it has is tips and tricks and business advice and information about being a doula and also the most recent podcast and you're also the first people to find out about classes and free workshops and things like that that I offer so that newsletter two or three times a month depending on how many Fridays there are is full of juicy value and I would love love love to have you on that list the link to sign up is at the top of the show notes for the episode or you can hit me on hit me up on instagram at haradula and I will send you the link I will see you in the next episode thanks for joining us for this episode of the doula tips and tips podcast if you learned something today or had an aha moment we'd love for you to share that on instagram and tag us at Haradula so we can celebrate alongside you if you found this podcast helpful we would so appreciate you taking a second to leave a rating and a review on your favorite podcast app that helps other doulas find us as we do this work together this podcast is intended as educational and entertainment it is not medical advice or business advice please consult your own medical or legal team for your own needs around your health and your business we'll see you again soon

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On a lighter note today: things I’ve done with clients at births that have been embarrassing…for me! Enjoy this beautiful episode. I hope it normalizes things for you and makes you laugh!

Quote from the show:

“you're welcome that you're benefiting from some of the ridiculousness that I have done or seen at births. Now I'm not going to share client information, of course, but I am going to share back from my earliest births some things that I consider embarrassing moments for myself, either when I was interacting with providers or with my clients or in any other scenario.”

CONNECT with Kaely on TikTok or  Instagram

https://www.tiktok.com/@doulacoach

https://www.instagram.com/Harroddoula/

If you like this episode, don't forget to share it to your Instagram stories and tag me @harroddoula

Kaely Daily is produced by Kaely Harrod of Harrod Doula Services

It is sponsored by The Birth Prep Blueprint Childbirth Class

Music by Madirfan: Hidden Place on Pixabay

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