Rerun: What Do I Do After A Birth?
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Transcript
Welcome back to doula tips and tits. This is our last rerun episode of the summer So we have been going through some of the most popular episodes from our 250 episodes So today's episode is number 250.
So that is a huge milestone that we're at as a podcast From those episodes we have had some that have been a wildly successful and have been listened to Literally hundreds of times and so that is what we've been going through this summer This is the last one of those so you have to look forward to some new content coming out starting next week Some awesome like really really exciting guest interviews that I just cannot wait to share with you There's some big names some really exciting stuff and we have some new stuff happening this fall So stay tuned for all of that I cannot wait to give you a rundown of what things look like this year in the business and Get you really excited about the ways that we can help you grow your business Alright enjoy this episode and I will see you.
Oh, I didn't even tell you what this episode is Okay, so this episode is episode 113 What do I do after I attend a birth? So we started kind of towards the beginning of this rerun series number three of the reruns Was what do I do before I head to a birth and we're ending with what do I do after a birth?
Like what is an after birth ritual for me that helps me be able to be sustained that helps me adjust after a birth And that helps me kind of come back into my family and my life in a way that feels really good and really sustainable All right, enjoy the episode and I will see you with a brand spanking new episode next week Welcome to doula tips and tips This podcast is a place where we answer one question about doula work both to support you and to help you support your clients I'm Kaylee Harrod.
I've been supporting families in this perinatal space since my oldest was born 12 nearly 13 years ago I am a birth and postpartum doula childbirth educator lalache League leader and a doula coach I love guiding and supporting doulas as they work out their doula business.
It is a tremendous joy to be trusted in this way Thank you for joining us on this journey All right, so today's episode is diving into the question, what do you do after attending a birth? So the last episode was before attending a birth, and this episode is all about after.
Now, some of the things are kind of similar, so it might sound a little redundant, but I like to think of it as kind of the bookends, right? So the pre and post -birth kind of ramp up and ramp down, right?
One big thing is to do whatever you have been needing to do. And what I mean when I say that is, sometimes at the end of a birth during pushing and then the immediate postpartum time, you're sort of not able to maybe leave and go to the bathroom or get some water or get some coffee or whatever.
So the very first thing I do when I leave a client after, and I'm completely leaving them, like I'm saying, okay, I'm gonna be texting you to see how you're doing. If you need anything, please let me know.
Are you comfortable with me leaving now? This is normally when I would leave. So I've legitimately been like, congratulations, happy birthday, baby. I will be talking to you guys soon. And I've left their room if they're in a hospital.
I've left their house if they're at a house. I've left the birth center, right? Or at least their room in the birth center. So the first thing I usually do is make sure my water is filled for my trip home.
And either get some coffee or plan on where I'm gonna stop to get both food and also some caffeine. Because I find that after every birth, I have a very strong rush of adrenaline around like pushing in birth time when it's kind of like, oh my gosh, you did it.
You had your baby, here we are. Baby's here. And then I'm like, whew. And my body comes down from that. And then I'm exhausted. And so it's really not safe for me to be driving if that happens and I don't have any kind of caffeine or anything to sort of keep me higher and keep me awake on the way home.
So I make sure I have my water bottle filled and all of that before I leave labor and delivery if I'm in a hospital or before I leave the birth center if I'm at a birth center. And then I also go to the bathroom because usually I have sort of been like hydrating well and that kind of stuff.
I really pay attention to that at a birth. And so I do typically need to pee before I leave and drive. So I do that, I go to the bathroom and then my very first thing when I leave wherever I am is getting some food.
The reason for that is that I usually really need to eat before I go home and go to sleep. And once I get home, it's really hard for me to feel like I have the energy to make myself food. And so I have a couple different sort of go -to post -birth meals.
Usually some kind of breakfast sandwich or some like hash browns, breakfast potatoes, something like that that feels like comforting and warm and easy to digest. Like that's sort of what I lean towards.
I also really love warm like grain and veggie salads. So there's a restaurant here in DC called Sweet Green that has like different kinds of warm salads that have some like cooked veggies and some raw veggies and different proteins and whatnot.
That's one of my favorite post -birth meals. Oftentimes when I'm leaving a birth in the middle of the night, I'm getting like a McDonald's breakfast sandwich and hash browns and coffee because that's the only thing that's open and I really need to eat.
It's easier for me to eat on the way home, like eating in the car or eating right before I get in the car because once I'm home, either I like everyone's asleep and I really just want to go to sleep or everybody's awake and they're all excited to see me and then they want some of my attention.
And so I don't want to just get home and crash if I can avoid that or get home and be like, I just have to eat and go to bed, you know, and be like grouchy and grouchy with people. So I eat something.
The other thing I do is talk, so it's very, very helpful for me to verbally process the birth, especially when something has been rough or something has been traumatizing or it's just been long or whatever, right?
So obviously if it's like two in the morning, I'm not necessarily talking to a person. Sometimes I'm literally just talking like I have a friend listening to me and I'm like talking to myself on my way home, you know?
I do really love jamming out to music if it's two in the morning and I can't call somebody and talk about it. So sometimes I'll do that, especially music that I can sing to because I really love singing and dancing and so singing and dancing to music on my way home also helps me stay awake, which is important.
And so when it's like the daytime on the morning or the afternoon, I have my mom is usually the person I talk to because she loves to hear about births and she loves for me to call and process them and she will validate me and encourage me and, you know, respond in like an active listening kind of way.
I sometimes call one of my sisters and talk through it with her, but she hasn't had a baby and so I don't want to terrify her. And so oftentimes it is my mom. I do then usually just go straight home.
I try really hard to go straight home because I'm usually really tired and my adrenaline is kind of waning and so then I don't want to be like, okay, I have to stop at the grocery store. I need to stop and run this errand.
I need to do that thing. I try to legitimately just go straight to my house if I can, if I can, right? Once I get home, the two things that I do is hug everybody like tell everybody hi, reconnect if they're awake and shower.
So I have had many times where I am like, I am so dead and I'm ready for sleeping and I still make myself take a shower because I think it's really helpful emotionally as well as it's helpful on like a practical level of like you've been with people and you've had germs and whatnot.
Who knows if you got a little amniotic fluid on you or whatever. So on that side, I think on a very practical note, you need to wash yourself after you've been at a birth because it's just a messy business, right?
And also, I think it's really helpful emotionally to kind of process through if it's been a really hard birth especially and I will typically just take a shower and literally climb straight into bed.
And so I'm showering, I'm like maybe brushing my teeth if I'm awake enough to do that and then sleeping. And I do find that like the time, the very few times when I have skipped a shower and gone straight to sleep because I'm like so dead, that hasn't felt as great in terms of like the ritual of coming down from a birth.
So I don't know if that sounds maybe silly to be like, oh, it's a big deal to not skip that shower, but really for me, I think it has been like really a soothing thing as well as a cleaning thing, right?
so that's my immediate kind of coming home and ending a birth scenario. The next thing that I do is try to stretch and massage. I have like a massage gun kind of thing. I have some different massage tools.
I have some different stretching tools. I really love doing yoga and pilates and so I have a foam roller. Like there are things that I do to work out some of the tension in my own body. I will say that even a fast birth is physically demanding for the doula and so there's a physical impact for the doula regardless and that's really important to note and to like give yourself space for recovery right.
So that's one thing that I do typically the next day. I very rarely stretch or massage or anything like that before I go to sleep unless my husband rec and unless my husband volunteers to do that. While I'm like essentially falling asleep because that's I can't stay awake while I'm doing it.
But that's a really important sort of like getting my body back into a good physical rhythm and mental space etc. The other thing that I really try to do in the coming days after the birth is get myself back on a normal sleep schedule especially if I've been up all night at the birth.
Now sometimes that's easier than other times depending on when the birth happened. The most recent birth I was at actually probably when this episode comes out it won't be the most recent but the most recent I've had when I'm recording this episode is was a birth that I joined them around 5 am and the baby came around noon and so I was home by like 3 am and so that was like it took a little less recovery in terms of sleep because I mean in terms of sleep like rearranging because I managed to like I tried to stay awake it didn't work I fell asleep on the living room floor and then my husband was just like go to bed.
So I went to sleep probably at 6 pm that night and then slept all night and so it was earlier than I would normally go to sleep and so I woke up at like 5 in the morning or something but because it was like almost to my normal nighttime time then which I mean I am a night owl so I don't go to sleep around 6 or 7 ever except in a situation like this and so it didn't take quite so many days to recover where when I get home at like 4 am and then sleep like almost all day then my sleep is off for like probably 4 or 5 days because my body is just like awake and asleep at the wrong times right so it depends on the timing of the birth how long that takes for me for my body and everybody is different in that but that's kind of the longer recovery process for me as well so I hope this was helpful.
I would love to hear from you just like in last episode when I said I would love to hear what your pre -birth things are. I would love to hear what your post -birth things are. I know that we're all a little different in how we recover from births but I would love to hear what you incorporate what's been helpful for you and what you find really makes a big difference physically and mentally and spiritually and emotionally and all of that.
So I look forward to the coming episodes. I'm super pumped about some things that we have coming up and also as always I love to answer your questions so please do take a minute to jump onto Instagram connect with me there.
Harad Dula is my handle over on Instagram and then send me a message with a question that you have for the podcast because I really really really would love to make sure that I am answering a question that is helpful and pertinent to you right now.
Okay all right until the next episode I wish you lovely informed consent -filled business and doula experiences. Thanks for joining us for this episode of the doula tips and tits podcast. If you learned something today or had an aha moment we'd love for you to share that on Instagram and tag us at harad doula so we can celebrate alongside you.
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Rituals before and after supporting clients are very important. Doulas need to have a ritual or routine that they do before and after client support, especially birth support and especially when that birth support was long or traumatic. It doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s but it is vital to have!
Quote from the show:
“this episode is episode 113 What do I do after I attend a birth? So we started kind of towards the beginning of this rerun series number three of the reruns. What do I do before I head to a birth and we're ending with what I do after a birth? Like what is an after birth ritual for me that helps me be able to be sustained, that helps me adjust after a birth And that helps me kind of come back into my family and my life in a way that feels really good and really sustainable.”
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Kaely Daily is produced by Kaely Harrod of Harrod Doula Services
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Music by Madirfan: Hidden Place on Pixabay